15 June 2010

I am a Bald-Faced Liar . . . And So Are You

How's your weekend been, dear readers? Mine has been a bit strange. I suddenly became sick Friday night with, well, I am not sure what. One minute I was happily typing away on my computer, the next I was lightheaded and suffering from a pounding headache and nausea. As to quote John Cleese, "I got better" on Saturday, but I was still a bit woozy and remained that way for the weekend, which is my excuse for wearing my shirt backwards all day Saturday, even though I kept denying that and instead thinking it was actually inside out. (It wasn't, but it most certainly was on backwards.) Maybe it was because I was all hopped up on generic over the counter pain medication. Yeehaw! Or, maybe, it 's just that I am the world's biggest space cadet when sick. I am not sure.

Anyway, in a time honored routine, I huddled in bed and read while my devoted and delightful Chihuahua of nearly ten years tried to make me feel better by using my head as a trampoline. He does this every time I am sick. That or he uses my head as a stage to tap dance on. And, as usual, he performs his little jump/dance routine for about five minutes while I whimper for him to stop, then he settles his delicate five pound frame next to me and sleeps quietly until I feel better. I do not even pretend to understand his methods, but I know he loves me with all of his little heart, as I do him. I think he is practicing an ancient medicinal dance of his native Mexico to restore my health.

But enough about me.

Spammy and Rebel gave me this most prestigious award, with the following instructions:

If you want this award, you must:
1. Thank the person who gave you the award (Thanks, Andrew and Rebel! :) )
2. Copy the logo and place it on your blog
3. Link to the person who nominated you
4. Tell up to six outrageous lies about yourself and at least one outrageous truth, or vice-versa
5. Nominate seven "creative" writers
6. Post links to the blogs you nominate
7. Leave a comment on each blog letting them know they've won the award.

So to that end, here are my lies . . . or are they truths?

1. When I was 5, I became so angry at a boy I had a crush on because he kept ignoring me that I decided to get his attention by running up to him at recess and then shrieking "I hate you! I hate you!" before kicking him in the crotch. He still hides from me to this day.

2. I know how to make a guitar out of a gasoline can.

3. When I was 7, I loved the book Matilda so much that I hid the school's copy in my desk the entire year and disavowed all knowledge of its whereabouts, so nobody else would take it from me until I was finished. Um, well not really keep it until I was finished so much as keep it so I could obsessively read it every day for the year. Do not judge me.

4. I never once got in trouble at school, because I was a goody-two-shoes. Or should I say I never once got caught getting in trouble at school. ^^

5. When I was a child, I wanted to be a veterinarian because I loved puppies and kitties and they loved me! When I was told I'd have to touch blood, I shrugged. Puppies and kitties would need help, anyway! But when I was told I'd have to touch saliva, I lost all interest.

6. When I was a junior in high school, my local homeschoolers' group took a week long trip to Chicago. My first day there I ended up getting lost at O'Hare Airport and spent hours walking in circles, wondering where everyone was. I finally gave up and sat on my luggage until someone noticed that I looked confused and pathetic. It works every time. :D

7. I am so shy that when I was twelve, I entered a local talent contest to play the piano and froze on stage. I got over my stage fright by running off stage and never, ever playing in public again.

I nominate 9 bloggers for this award, just because, well, I don't see why I have to choose seven:


And whoever can correctly guess which is truth and which is fiction--or guesses better than everyone else--will get, um, well, will get their name mentioned with lots of exclamation marks and be awarded e-cookies when I post the truth. :D


  1. Gosh, Zella, you're either a real good liar, or these are all true. They seem all true to me! *doesn't get any e-cookies*

  2. *crafty smile* We shall see, Scott. ^^ :D

  3. Thanks Zella, now I need to find several more bloggers...
    Oh, and I suspect no. 5 to be a lie.

  4. You're welcome, Jourdie! I can't wait to see your list. :)

  5. Aw, sorry you were sick Zella! That's adorable about your chihuahuas; my cats sit on me when I'm feeling sick. :D
    Very good lies, these are going to be hard to guess!

    Not sure what to think about 1, but I was actually in a fairly similar situation in first grade (don't judge me!) and I saw the boy in question a few months ago. :S 'twas awkward.
    2 might be true, it sounds pretty cool. For 3 I shall guess true using my nerd twin psychic powers, because Mathilda was one of my favorites at that age too. :D
    4 I'll guess yes, and 5 yes too; I had a similar realization with being a doctor. I can take the blood, but not the needles. x) I'm hoping 6 is false, because that's a sad story! 7 I shall assume true. Can't wait to see the answers. :)

    Oh dear oh dear, I forgot to nominate other bloggers! Gosh was a being spacey that day. But most of my blog followers have already been nominated, so maybe I'll just forget about it? Hm, not sure what to do.

  6. Thanks, Feathery! I am feeling better now. I have no idea what made me so sick this weekend.

    Ah, you have made some clever guesses, my dear nerd twin. But my lips are sealed until I post the answers, which will probably be Thursday. :)

    If you want to nominate people, you can do it in a separate post. But if you don't want to mess with it, it's probably not a big deal. :)

  7. These are just so absurd I can't imagine them being lies.

    1) I had a boy I had a crush on in first grade. He was very huggable, but he hated me. So I chased him all through recess. I wonder if he remembers me......
    So I'd have to say that's true.
    2) A second of clever internet searching told me this was, indeed, possible.
    So true.
    3) I'm 16, and I STILL love Matilda. So much so that it was the book that received the honor of being read the night before my eye surgery. (Whenever I have surgery, one or two books get the honor of me deeming them good enough to distract me from my nervousness. There's often music that can do this, too.)
    So that must be true.
    4) I've gotten lunch duty for being late, and once, in third grade, I was playing with my then-friends (the bad boys), and I got annoyed waiting in our tree home (as in, it was our home, and it was under a tree) so I went to find them where they were collecting food. I accidentally wandered off school property and got in trouble.
    So I declare that that is false.
    5) This is funny. True.
    6) We once got caught in an airplane delay on the way to my uncle's wedding. I was the ring bearer, along with my brother (he was 4 and I was 10). It lasted six hours, and we missed the rehearsal. But I got on national Brasilian television (sitting on my godmother's lap).
    Also, I once got stuck in a bathroom because the door was too heavy for me to open. True.
    7) hahahahahahaha as a speechie and debater, I can't fathom stage fright. But I know it happens. So the jury's still out on this one.

    I will wait with bated breath for you to reveal the answers.

  8. Sorry. My comment was very long. I started a blog to keep myself from being longwinded everywhere else.....I suppose it doesn't work that well haha.

  9. Hehe Patrice, you also have made some clever guesses. *lips are still sealed until Thursday* :D

    Thanks for following and commenting! :)

    I am sorry about your eye surgeries. :( A good book is the perfect way to feel better! :)

  10. LOL No problem with being long-winded! I am the same way. My blogs help enable me. :D


    THANK YOU!!!!!

  12. LOL You're welcome, Aly! I can't wait to see your list of lies! :)

    Thursday I should have the answers up. :D

  13. Eek! I have no idea which are true and which are not! You're such a good liar!

    Thank you for the award, as well. I feel loved. :)

    Oh, and I loved the John Cleese reference.

  14. Lets see,

    1) A crush at 5? Oh dear...
    2) Sure, but would you WANT to??
    3) I'm judging you.
    4) This would contradict #3
    5) Plausible.
    6) Junior? You should know how to follow signs by then, I hope!!!
    7) No, you would have sat down at the piano and made a lot of mistakes, but I doubt you'd run out screaming. :D

    I pick 5. :)

  15. @Penguins, thank you! You are loved, my dear Penguins! I can't wait to see your list. (And I'm glad you liked the Monty reference. :D)

    @sky: You have made some astute observations. I shall unveil the truth tomorrow. (That sounds rather ominous . . . ) I can't wait to see your list of lies! :)

  16. Love the story about the guy playing the gas can guitar! I bet they weren't trained for that!

    Like the blog and your quirkiness, I'd love it if you could stop by my blog sometime! withmosnters.blogspot.com

  17. Molly, Hehe I would love to see a gasoline can guitar course offered at a conservatory. :D

    Thank you! Glad you enjoy it! (Also glad that my insanity doesn't frighten you. ^^) I shall definitely check your blog out. :)